Rise and shine, readers of the internet…

I didn’t actually go out last night so I’m enjoying a #rare productive weekend morning. In related news, how many of you slept in your makeup last night? Keep your answer to yourself, I don’t actually care but you should. Just like teen drinking, sleeping in your makeup is very bad – yo I got a pro tip though – buy a pack of makeup remover towelettes and toss them in your nightstand. So long as you’re sleeping in *your* own bed, you have no excuse not to let your skin breathe sans makeup at night. You’re welcome! Now onto our feature presentation: my eyelashes.

I’m self-admittedly obsessed with my lashes but apparently I’m not the only one as people constantly ask me if I’m wearing falsies or WHAT mascara have I discovered?! This is terrible, but for years I used CoverGirl LashBlast because the tar-like consistency was the only thing to control my lashes, plus I wore like three coats per application of face so I ran through tubes like nobody’s business. You do the math. What really kept me going back was that the wand stood up against my lashes, and I’ve felt victimized by not being able to find a higher quality product with the same oomph but less ouch. Enter: Benefit’s They’re Real! mascara.

I’m a big fan of Benefit and used to wear their BADgal lash daily, so I was definitely down to buy and try this one once I saw it. What intrigued me was the wand – it stood up against my lashes but it’s flexible still and that spindly top is a true game changer. One coat of this is all it takes for lashes to look beyond real, so I understand how they came up with the name. I like that it doesn’t add too much volume, I think that would be overwhelming considering the length… You get a naturally dramatic eye with minimal effort that makes you appear polished, like you might actually have your shit together – a great distraction for when you’re actually balls deep in your latest mistake.